MasConcepts Incorporated

Got myself into $60k worth of debt. My rent was unmanageable for quite sometime, almost $3,000 a month, for an Extended Stay Hotel — it was the easiest thing for me when I first moved here — shit decision, I know.

I also blew through my nest egg to help my Significant Other. Would I do things differently? No. I love her, BUT I learned my lesson: don’t give someone everything you have — and then some — and more beyond that.

I’ve attempted to take my life, and spent time in a mental hospital, and I can barely sleep at night. I’ve taken steps to fix the problems. I’m usually not this irresponsible, but what’s done is done.

This was on me, but I’m ready to rebuild.

I honestly just needed to write this down.

I’ve got a strict budget ready.

I’m going to talk to an attorney. I barely own anything, just rent and trying to save someone I love got me here. I’ve already done the IRS math, and I qualify — will let the attorney be the final arbiter, but I wanted to see if Chapter 7 or 13 would be my path. Even a Chapter 13 would help me sleep at night. I’ve managed to make all the minimum payments by getting my grocery bill down to like $30 a week and only eating enough to live, along with throwing rent on a credit card, and waiting for a third— and even a fourth — check to come in. I also took out a low-interest credit line, and converted it to cash. I kept this money in my account to give me a buffer, but I don’t want to wait until my account is depleted before taking action. I’m willing to give it all to the Trustee, just so I can finally sleep — it’s not really my money anyways.

I’m tired of living like this. I’m tired of crying. I can’t believe I tried to end my life. You never understand this stress until you’ve lived it, and I’m living it.